3 Types of Boundaries

You may have heard about the benefits of setting boundaries with family, friends, and coworkers—by communicating your needs and wants, you can boost your self-esteem, prioritize your mental and emotional health, and improve your overall well-being. In the long run, boundaries can also enhance the relationships you have with those around you since they can help you feel respected instead of resentful. But did you know that there are numerous types of boundaries? Here are three of the most common:

1. Physical boundaries – You communicate how you want to be touched and how much personal space you need. For example, you can let a colleague know that you’d rather shake hands instead of hugging or kissing. This doesn’t just apply to your body, either—you can also let your in-laws know that you don’t feel comfortable having them enter your bedroom while they’re babysitting.
2. Material boundaries – You communicate when you’re willing to lend out money and possessions and how you want them to be treated. For instance, you can let a friend know that you can’t afford to lend them more than $100. Or, you can tell your son that he can only borrow your car if he returns it with a full tank of gas.
3. Time boundaries – You communicate how you want to use your time. For example, you can tell your boss that you can’t stay past the end of your scheduled workday. Or, you can ask your spouse to refrain from calling and texting while you’re having dinner with friends except in case of an emergency.

Signs of Unhealthy Boundaries in Relationships:

1. Difficulty Saying No: Struggling to refuse requests, leading to overcommitment and stress.
2. Feeling Responsible for Others’ Happiness: Believing it is your duty to ensure others are always happy, even at your own expense.
3. Neglecting Personal Needs: Prioritizing others over yourself, often leaving you feeling drained and unfulfilled.
4. Fear of Rejection: Avoiding setting boundaries due to the fear of being rejected or disliked.
5. Allowing Others to Dictate Decisions: Letting others control your choices, leading to a loss of autonomy.
6. Emotional Dependency: Relying heavily on others for validation and self-worth.
7. Lack of Privacy: Feeling uncomfortable asserting your need for personal space and time.
8. Avoiding Conflict: Preferring to keep peace by not voicing your true feelings or needs.
9. Guilt Over Boundaries: Feeling guilty or anxious when attempting to enforce boundaries.
10. Over-identifying with Others’ Problems: Absorbing others’ issues as if they were your own, leading to emotional burnout.

Start Setting Boundaries in Your Life

If you need help implementing any of the boundaries described above, contact me today and schedule a free consultation.

I understand the many benefits that healthy boundaries can offer, and I’ll work with you to identify the steps you’ll need to take to set them in your life.